It feels like forever since I was last here. Writing seems to be a luxury nowadays – just as how time and travel are. Today, I write because my heart is full and contented.
I think I’m in love.
You see, I sat down on the prayer mat sometime during the new year, crying my hearts out, asking God for a miracle. By miracle I actually mean for Him to soften my heart.
I admit, I may not be the best of Muslimahs around, but I believe in the signs He has shown me. All my life, I make decisions based on what the universe has shown me. When my heart is directed at something and it becomes easy for me to take action, I know that it’s Him doing his magic – the magic of granting our dua’s.
Allah is fair and just – there’s really no doubt about that. He gives me some things that He takes away from others. He makes sure my family has enough sustenance no matter what the inner voices might say. He gives me the strength to go through the tough times. If anything, He has taught me that nothing good never comes easy for me.
So while I used to cry myself to sleep comparing others who have it a lot easier than me, I now accept the fact that Allah simply loves me more hence He just tests me more.
Today, I am in love.